She Cried Today.
She cried because her pregnancy journey will end with a Caesarean section (C-section).
She cried because pregnancy to her that means she didn’t earn her baby
She cried because she felt she wasn’t a ‘real’ mother/woman.
She cried because she will not be able to labor her baby into the world.
She cried because she was embarrassed to tell her husband.
She cried because to her – she has failed.
My heart hurt for this 1st time mother. This mother who has planned from the 1st positive pregnancy test for this baby, prayed for this baby, dreamed about her pregnancy and mentally prepared for the birth of her baby.
My heart hurt because she could not see there is more than one road to a healthy baby.
She Cried Today
I spent time with her. I talked with her. I wanted my words to acknowledge her feeling and empower her to own her birth story.
I wanted her to know :
She is a Mother
She is a Woman
She has not failed but is winning and has won.
She has carried this child for almost 40 weeks; who she loves without ever meeting. She has nurtured this child in utero doing everything right to set the stage to welcome her little one into the world. Her desire is to have the perfect pregnancy journey, which to her is to have a vaginal delivery.
She Cried Today
She left her office visit with a look of resignation and anxiousness in her eyes.
I will see her once more before her scheduled C-section. I will speak with her, comfort her, encourage her to express her feelings, hopes, and thoughts.
In my mind and heart:
My hope , my prayer is that she will always know:
The journey of pregnancy and parenting may not always be linear. That she will learn to expect the unexpected, that plans change.
Regardless of how her birth story unfolds ; that she will remember:
She is a Mother
She is a Woman
She is Strong
Her name is Mama
Her Baby = Love
Healthy Mom/Healthy Baby
Mary Echols, RN , BSN, MSN
Wife/Mother/ Registered Nurse/ “Champion of All Pregnant Women”
Contact Mary @ theadventuresofpregnancy@yahoo.com
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The Amazing Adventures of Pregnancy 
Love this! There is so much presser on pregnant Mamas ( most of which we put on our selves)This is such a encouraging post!
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Thank you for stopping by and commenting. I agree! Moms do a lot and go through a lot carrying a baby. Then delivering the baby. My heart hurts when a mom feels as if she has failed or is less if her delivery doesn’t go as plan. I hope our culture will change towards a goal of No Guilt mentality and healthy mom/healthy baby. 😀
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Just beautiful. I worked in post-partum before and even floated to labor and delivery. I’ve definitely experienced the blessings of having a baby and sadness for other matters.
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Being a mother is a tough job and we often feel like failures even as our children become adults. Great post.
You have a fascinating career!
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Thank you. I truly love what I do. I agree- being a mother is very rewarding and it’s definitely a contest against myself to do better and be better.
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Beautifully written. I’ve had 4 pregnancies, and none turned out like I expected. 2 were induced and vacuumed, the third was natural (which from the first two I was completely unprepared for because I just assumed my babies had to be vacuumed out) and the fourth was a miscarriage. There are many ways to have babies, and any way that results in a little, breathing bundle of joy is the best way in my opinion.
– Christine
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Thank you for commenting. You are so right. Pregnancy, Labor & Delivery is so Amazing. I believe it doesn’t matter if it’s your first or 10th- each time is different. Unfortunately , the journey does always end the way you want and dreamed about. As you said-when the way or end results ” in a little , breathing bundle of joy is the best way”! 😀
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This is truly beautiful ❤ While I am not a mother, I know many women who feel inadequate because of the fact they didn't deliver vaginally…that breaks my heart. You still carried and loved that baby the entire term, c-section or not that woman is a mother!
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I agree! 100%
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Beautiful post! I have to admit that I felt guilty when I was unable to deliver without an epidural. But as soon as I saw my little angels, all that mattered was that they were healthy & finally here!
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Thank you for the comment. There is a lot of guilt Women feel when they can’t have a vaginal delivery. Like you said you had the chance to bring your babies home-healthy and happy! That’s the main goal always 😀 Thank you for sharing your story
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Love this. I had to have three c-sections. I never questioned the fact that I couldn’t have them naturally until a “friend” made a comment about being mortified that her doctor suggested that she might have to have one. Thank you for posting this.
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Thank you for stopping by. 😀 If I could change one thing : it would be the guilt and judgement culture associated with they type of delivery a person has to have. As a mother , of course we dream about the day we meet our baby and how we will meet them. Unfortunately , it doesn’t always go according to plan. The most important thing is we get to bring our babies home-healthy , happy and in our arms 😀
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I had to have a c-section with my first baby and it was definitely a little nerve wracking because the whole time I had been thinking about a vaginal birth and so to switch gears and think about my delivery differently was challenging. But I’m so grateful for my dr and those who assisted him because I got a beautiful baby girl out of it.
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Thanks for stopping by!It can definitely be scary- especially if you were not mentally prepared. I’m so glad you had a doctor you trusted and your delivery went well. You went home with a beautiful baby girl. That’s the most important part 😊
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That just breaks my heart. I’ve had babies both ways and I really think people underestimate how hard c-sections are to recover from, even when it all goes well.
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